eBusiness Weekly
Arthur Marara
What will cause the downfall for many of us is not criticism, but praise. We often think we are flawless mostly but weirdly, we are only best at what we do. This is not of course not to say that you should not celebrate your successes, but this has to be done in proportion and should leave room for criticism.
Criticism hurts, but it preserves at times. We all want to be showered with praise and be told how good we are, but sometimes, you need a bit of humility to learn your shortcomings and improve on them.
Criticism has often been viewed in the negative sense, and many people always put corks in their ears when criticism is coming.
Well, destructive criticism will always be there, but you want to be open minded enough to distinguish between destructive and positive criticism. Once in a while you need to employ a Devil’s advocate if you are going to develop in your life.
History behind the “Devil’s advocate”
Quite a scary term, if you hear of the Devil’s advocate for the first time. The concept has its roots in the Roman Catholic Church.
It was critical during the process of canonisation. The Church authorities would appoint a “Promoter of the Faith” (promoter fidei), who was also known as the Devil’s advocate (advocatus diaboli).
The Devil’s advocate was a canon lawyer whose brief was to argue against the canonisation of a candidate. The thrust of the Devil’s advocate will be to look into the character of the candidate in search of spotty areas of their life.
The opposite of the Devil’s advocate is God’s advocate who would basically present arguments in support of a person.
The concept of the Devil’s advocate has now been developed and has been adopted even outside the religious circles. In modern terms, a Devil’s advocate is a person who deliberately takes a position that they do not necessary associate with, but this would be done with an intention to invite others in an argumentative discussion process.
The mischief of the whole process is to interrogate the substance and quality of the original argument and identify weaknesses in its structure. Holistically viewed, an improvement in an argument or a thought process can be achieved.
Employ a Devil’s advocate in your life
There is always another side to everything. Surround yourself with people who give you a different view to life. Present your vision or dreams to people who are able to bring out the rational side of life.
There are many times that we get so consumed in whatever that we want to do, and forget that there is actually a better way of doing things. It is very dangerous to surround yourself with people who are only good at praising you.
Does this sound familiar?
Have you ever been in a meeting where everyone seemed to “agree” with the “boss” on every point said, but immediately after they leave the meeting they quickly rubbish everything? You are not alone, this is the trend in several organisations, businesses, or even churches etc today where the unwritten culture does not permit people to freely speak up their mind, concerns and their contribution towards the organisation.
I dealt with this in my previous article on psychological safety. You may want to read it if you missed it. Surround yourself with people who have the burden for your vision, and want to see you succeed by bringing out the other side of you. Enable the people to speak out to you and enable you to see your shortcomings. Do not just expect praise from people, open up for criticism.
W. Somerset Maugham once made an interesting remark, “People ask for criticism, but they only want praise.”
Criticism preserves and works for you
“Few people have the wisdom to prefer the criticism that would do them good, to the praise that deceives them”. (Francois de La Rochefoucauld).
In the absence of criticism it is sometimes very difficult or even impossible for us to actually realise that there are certain areas in our life that need to be addressed.
If people at work are always praising you, it might be difficult for you to realise that there are actually weaknesses in some areas of your life. If you want to grow in your profession and life in general, invest in people who are not afraid to criticise you.
Sir Winston Churchill once made some very profound remarks on criticism — “Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.”
Ask for what you need and not what you want to hear
The thrust for many people is that we ask for what we want to hear, not what we need to hear. The want is for entertainment and your personal gratification, but the need is for your growth and development. Many people are very vulnerable when they are being told what they want to hear.
They operate in the subjective world, they are actually on top of the world and no one is above them. This is the reason why many people praise you before asking for a favour. You want to grow, change your focus, and request honest criticism and not just praise. Praise will ruin you.
Sir Norman Vincent Peale bequeathed to us an interest nugget of wisdom, “The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.” Several people are being praised in immorality rather than preserved by the truth that will drive them from this practice.
Will you employ a Devil’s advocate? That’s my greatness challenge for you this week. Stay inspired.
Join me on Star FM on Wednesdays (09:30am-10:00am) for some moments of inspiration on the Breeze with Tariro “Mai Judah”.
Arthur Marara is a corporate law attorney, keynote and peak performance speaker, business strategy facilitator commanding the stage with his delightful humour, raw energy, and wealth of life experiences. He is a financial wellness expert and is passionate about addressing the issues of wellness, sales, business leadership and strategy. Arthur is the author of the “Personal Development Toolkit”, “Keys to Effective Time Management” among other inspirational books. Follow him on social media, or WhatsApp him on +263718867255 or email [email protected].
